A Humble Attempt at Scurrility - 25
Indeed they “had much rather eat
Than spend their Money on a BET.”
—And they might have added, poor Souls! if the learned Doctors of the College had no material Objection to furnishing a good Rhime, and the pitiful Master D—n would promise not to take Offence;
We “Authors had much rather eat”
Than run the Risque of being beat.
IT is diverting to hear one of these “poor Authors” (as they justly stile themselves when they speak of their Authorship) talk of the Danger of being “frighten’d out “of his WITS,” and yet discover to his Readers that he has not even the Wit to know the Difference between leaving a Matter to Arbitration, and laying a Wager. Alas, poor Devil! even your Employer has Wit enough to know, and could have informed you, that every Man in his Wits, who has any Dispute with the Prop—rs about Property, chuses, tho’ he may have the Law ever so clear of his Side, rather to leave the Matter to Arbitration, where he has “Half a Chance of a favourable Decree,” than run the Risque of a Decision from a Pr—ry C—f-J—ce.
BUT the true Reason for this Jack-Pudding’s terming Mr. H—s’s Proposal a Wager, was, I imagine, that he might take that Opportunity of sneering at and ridiculing his Master, as he had done before in what he said about his “Modesty and Sense.” This seems plain from his very Words, viz. “I have heard a noisy Fellow in a Coffee House, after every other Argument failed, offer (Reason or not Reason) to lay Two to One he was right.” Now I appeal to every Frequenter of the Coffee-House, and even to those who sit in another House, whether our illustrious Chief has not been more distinguish’d for that Practice than any other Person they know, and whether the Description above quoted is not strictly applicable in all its Parts to his Worship’s Honour.
